Retrospective

being picked up at the arrivals of Frankfurt International Airport

After 357 days abroad, 3 countries in Southeast Asia, 11 take offs and landings, 18 hotel-rooms, cottages and apartments and innumerable experiences and people I finally arrived back in Germany at the morning of 21^st February. And I am not so happy to be in my country of origin again. This place does not give me much anymore. Anyways, I was happy to see my parents who picked me up at the airport. I have spent the last two weeks at home, trying to get back into life here. Probably it won’t be possible unless I have my own flat again. I have met my friends; we did an Asia photo-slideshow. I have been to university and have met my lecturers discussing some initial organizational matters. It was all nice, but somehow it remains all empty here. There are no people out on the streets; they separate each other in offices and houses. There is no soul in Germany. Everything is clean, but yet not nice. Life here is boring for me. And maybe also for the other Germans; they seem to have compensated with what they have, believe to have or what they do not have.

polar atmosphere at Suvarnabhumi International Airport

During the last year in Asia I always perceived it as not as perfect as I hoped it would be, but in retrospective it was a great and exciting year. It started with meeting Moji. We became friends and she had shown me various views into Thailand which I would have never gained without her. Thailand has always been fascinating for me, and yet difficult to understand, more difficult than Vietnam or Indonesia. It was the best time I have ever had in the kingdom and I miss my friend much. After Thailand, I made my dream come true to live on Bali – at least for almost five months. I was able to combine studies, work, meeting new people, surfing and that great simple but luxury lifestyle the place always offers. When I was there, I was still not fit and somehow it all seemed not as exciting as I had imagined before. But maybe it was better that way and seen from afterwards it was the best time I ever had. Living on Bali for a lasting time still remains my big dream and I hope that one day I can make it come true in the future. Lesna played a big role in my stay in Indonesia and made it the great time it was; she, Reinhold, Julia, Tom and Hannes will remain people, with whom I had shared a wonderful stay on paradise-island. After a short stopover in Thailand I came to Vietnam. At first, there were chaotic months in Ho Chi Minh City, with Christopher, Trang and of course with Thuy Hang. The time was not always easy – as Vietnam has never been only easy for me. With the start of the internship in Tra Vinh and two weeks later in Hanoi my everyday life became more structured and my return to Saigon for Tet showed that the relationship between me and Thuy Hang - although it is still not an easy one - also takes a more stable shape. Finally I had that ten hours transit stay at Bangkok international airport which should beam me back to Germany, to another world, to another age somehow.

good times in Hanoi at Huong’s birthday party

a lonely meal as an urban nomad at Pho 24 restaurant

Of course the past year also brought some achievements. I have learnt the fundamentals of business management and could see the practical application of what I have learnt in the capacity building and institutional development approach of our project. I have done studies and work in different cultural environments and gained much of practical skills which will be inevitable for successfully performing in future jobs. But probably the most important thing I have learnt about myself is that I should be more open towards other people. One does not have to completely change one’s character to become a bit more social. I saw that you can always and everywhere meet some nice people who can become new friends. I should not be the loner so much anymore, should become more social. Even if there is a case in which there is not so much interest in another person and the matter of socialising is more about a certain thing or business, one can still widen the horizon through openness towards different characters and views. For sure I will never be very social, but I already started to become a bit more social and re-developed in a positive way from the “nurd” I was at risk to become through too much of learning…some say I am still such one. So besides job matters I also had whole range of social experiences from real hospitality and developing friendships, to being alone as a kind of urban nomad.

great welcome at home with close friends

fun and good talks with the guys – something that I have been missing

My nick name turns out to be Christ rather than Chris, my Indonesian name is still Kris, and now I even have two Vietnamese names which are “ba cây” (“daddy tree” instead of “western daddy” which I was given by Be…long story) and “ông Krit” (Mr. Kris with pronunciation mistake, which came from the project environment). Despite these word-plays, much happened in the past year what is impossible to express in words. I had the chance to build my personality and to have a deeper experience with living abroad and as a transit personality. I have learnt to accommodate a bit more to different people and societies and have also learnt to handle uncertainty much easier. Even more than before I do now feel that there is not only one truth in the world. That also led to the current perception of my country of origin, which is accompanied by stronger surprise than I had expected. Surprisingly enough I finally feel that I will really not be able to stay in this country only. The safety of this place makes me fearful. I am already writing applications in order to go abroad again immediately after my major subject final exam in summer. This Blog will be maintained and kept up to date with information on where I am, where I will be, what I am doing, what I will be doing, who I am and who I will be.

I thank my family who supported me to make my dream come true and my friends who were always cheering me up, there, and through maintained contact via the world-wide-web. Thank you!